The Tombstone We Carry

RB McFee

Email: drmcfee2020@gmail.com

 Royalty free image from: https://www.publicdomainpictures.net/en/view-image.php?image=32391&picture=tombstones  Let me start off with a cheery notion – in the time it has taken you to read this sentence you are nearly 5 seconds closer to dying. We all have an expiration date stamped on us the moment we breathed our first bit of air, and only God knows what it says, how it will happen, and when it will be.

What is said and what will memorialize our lives is not out of our control. Every day we add a sentence or write a word that people remember us by.

Why talk about this after the joy of Easter? Precisely because of Easter and the assignment Jesus gave to His Apostles, and to us – share the good news.

It is easy to do so surrounded by fellow believers, fellow people of faith. We affirm and inform each other, encouraging our thoughts and the journey in Christ we each take. This is certainly true of our weekly Bible Journey Group (you are invited) – a time of discernment in the comfort of confidentiality and camaraderie.

But what about when we all leave the confines of weekly church or one of the various ministries our house of worship engages in, and we face a world that increasingly questions the validity of Jesus and the viability of living a Christian life, especially if we are alone in a group of people who are agnostics, or have left the church?

How do we share the Gospel, the Good News of Christ, the Light of Christ in a darkened world?

The other day I was having lunch with a dear friend and colleague. We were talking about some of the people who touched our lives in profound ways, several of whom are now gone. And yet these people live on – in palpable, personal and perennial ways.

And they live on not because of the professional reputations they created, or the material success they have accrued. Those are nice, and allow provision for family and philanthropy. But I’ve never seen a U-Haul being pulled by a hearse, and few people lament the loss of a friend because he or she was the best computer scientist, professor, or scientist – all important professions, and certainly can enhance peoples’ lives.

No, you and I write our eulogies and our tombstones in far more personal and lasting ways beyond our professional or athletic achievements, and on a daily basis.

Sobering notion, we rewrite our tombstone and eulogy on a daily basis.

For instance, over lunch we talked about his friend Clarence – who it was said had a gift for seeing and bringing out the inner Light in others.

Wow, that’s quite a statement! And that’s how we remember Clarence. It is the tombstone we carry of him.

It is one thing to see the inner Light in others, acknowledging God is present even in grumpy or quiet or sad or loner type folks. But then to help those same people reveal more of their inner Light, and act towards their higher angel, that is an accomplishment. 

Whether reflexively or intentionally, trying to see the Light, the Lord in others regardless of politics, economics, age gap, faith differences, or sports teams, that is a gift.

One of my favorite Bible passages, and something worth holding ourselves accountable to is from

“And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men.”

Colossians 3:23 NKJV

If we follow this scripture, it can inform all our actions, whether putting the shopping cart* back even when we are tired and it would be easier to just put it on the grass behind our car, or return a smile to someone who was snippy to us, and wishing them a good day, when that’s not perhaps what you or I would really wish them were it not for our commitment to Jesus.

Jesus commends us to better than the often bad or base behaviors we face in the world. And, it is not easy. It is not easy to hear lofty ideals and then live up to them; this is especially true when most people live as if no One is watching.

We then talked about people who made us better by their presence, not their absence.

And we laughed when I posited one of the metrics I try to hold myself accountable to – the room should be better because I entered it, not because I left it.

Sounds funny but how we make others feel when they engage us is part of our ministry – and the grade is pass – fail. If I don’t make you feel like you matter when I interact with you, I’ve failed – God, and myself. If you don’t see some vestige of my faith in and love for Jesus when you meet or hang out with me, I’ve failed – God, and myself. I’ve failed you, too!

Put differently – do people see Jesus in you, in me by our actions, our countenance?

Whoever said ‘you might be the only Bible someone reads’ – a commentary on how our behaviors reflect our true beliefs in God Almighty, was pretty accurate. People are attracted to or repelled by religion based upon their experiences with ‘religious’ people.

The only way we truly share the Good News of Jesus is by how we reflect Him in our lives.

If we crumble at the first challenge in life and bail on Jesus, not sure how that will inspire others to trust in the Lord. If we stand firm in the Lord when the winds of outrageous fortune blow against us, others want to know Where we got that inner strength.

Whether St. Francis said these words or someone else did, they are worth a look….

“Preach the Gospel at all times; use words if necessary.”

Every day, every encounter is an opportunity for someone to write our eulogy, to carve words on our future tombstone by how we reflect the Love of Jesus.  And every evening, if we reflect on how we lived our day, we, too will know what the words should say describing how well people met Jesus through us.

God willing eulogies and tombstones are a long, long, long, long way away, but let us strive to have written on the tombstone we carry and rewrite every day – “he or she lived the Love of Christ, and by his/her actions invited others to the Gospels.” Shorter version, may it be said “well done, good and faithful servant.”

*link to Shopping Cart Christianity blog https://www.charltoncityumc.org/post/shopping-cart-christianity